Control in the earthly realm is a defence and a place of safety for when emotions feel overwhelming and ‘out of control’. If one was to relinquish control (a core belief), one would disappear for not being able to cope with the flood of feelings. Control serves a function and rightly so in some circumstances when psychological struggle is so great there is no other way. However, to describe this state as it would look externally it would appear one-sided, devoid of emotional engagement and deep sadness for not being able to ‘go there’. This can apply to controlling the environment, others, behaviour, events, structures and yourself that often goes hand-in-hand with self-harm. To decide whether to let go of the control and open up fully to life is a difficult and personal decision that involves a long recovery process.

Sometimes when earthly control becomes unmanageable and challenging one might turn to spiritual in order to feel containment. This is spiritual by-pass and manifestation of that arrival into the spiritual realm will look the same. There will be impossible to progress or be in a way that spiritual is due to that emotional disengagement. One would feel resentful and unfulfilled, as spiritual doesn’t do control. It operates differently and is accessible to everyone but depends the road you approach it from.

In the spiritual there is only flow, there is no tangible experience of pain, loss, time and space. It flows and manifests. It is like the wind, not static or contained, therefore, impossible to control however hard we might try. It requires a completely openness emotionally, physically and letting go of thought structures, etc. Difficult right? Yes, but not impossible. If we manage to engage with the fleeting spiritual experience only for a minute that is already something that will never be taken away. It is moments of bliss, complete alignment with something much bigger than us, a sense of utter stillness, sweet-tasting and transparent like air. In that place we can’t work for ourselves or against the other, we have to work with it. It cannot be manipulated.

With questions come in lately about the publishing process and whether self-publishing is better or worse than a traditional route, my answer and recommendation is to look deeper into your relationship with control, your sense of self, your ability to allow for things to happen, your beliefs about how life experience comes into being. As my life is intuitive in every aspect this is something that comes as anything else natural would. My mind, body and emotions operate in a way that it has its own way of arriving at answers. Perhaps, you are similar? The route that you choose is dependent on many variables, but one thing you can look at is yourself. What are you like with control and why? Do you have faith and trust in what is right will be? Do you believe that things happen for a reason and only when all the elements are aligned something comes into fruition? Can you go with the flow? It applies to anything and this process is no exception. Writing is another process that the idea of ‘control’ amidst others can be explored. I truly believe in experience. Once you had an experience you should be able to self-reflect, analyse (if you prefer that word) and make a choice based on your awareness of your experience. So far for me, e.g. I am a traditional publishing type of person for many reasons. It is about pace, not having control is a benefit, freedom to create in the meantime and many more other factors will be clarified as I go along, I am sure. It is what it is right now and never say never, things change and turn, but what you need to know is your inner true, most fundamental make-up with how you are in the world, with others and yourself. Know yourself and you will be able to find answers to anything.