Spring Equinox dream

Ostara 2018

I had an Ostara dream of giving birth, first to a girl and then a boy. They were two separate pregnancies and births and both spoke of healing, balance and transformation. As I began to wake up a sense of wonder, peace, joy and satisfaction laid over me with vivid presence. It covered me in a place safe and knowing and I was content.

Both births happened fairly quickly and naturally. They flowed the way, I felt, it was meant to be. A very physical experience yet easy, calm and trusting. It brought a true healing to my experience of childbirth in real life that had been very traumatic and for many years my mind blocked it out and forgotten with the body carrying the trauma within and manifesting terror in many ways. I had birth dreams before, but nothing like this one. Last night it spoke of the way things get birthed into being and when trust and knowing is present it can be a natural and easy process. We hear about it often yet it is not always so and for many reasons.

With spring equinox coming into life the importance of balance comes into place. Feminine and masculine energies begin to birth into what is to become a union later on in May. It felt magical and so timely to birth that experience of both as equal into the world. Both the girl and the boy were born safely and into a lot of love around them.

Birth dreams are often referred to a new beginning, a journey of growth and potentially transformation. Spring is a vulnerable time of transition and many things get born into this world during spring and not everything or everyone survives. It is a time of doubt and trepidation but also hope and a possibility of nurturing and creating.

Prior to my Ostara dream for a few nights I dreamt of dead bodies, body parts and holding on to stuff that had died some time ago. Those dreams are frequent and come about when it is time I let go of the weight of the past and allowed some parts of myself die and bury it ‘not in shallow graves like in my dreams’, but deep within the darkness and nourishment of the earth. Earth is a transmitter of all energy and what’s left always goes where it is needed. Death dreams are always followed by birth dreams. It seems to be a pattern my dreams follow.

This particular Ostara dream also told me that a birth doesn’t have to be painful, traumatic, rushed or unsupported. It can be truly invigorating, hard, but rewarding work and results are delicate and hopeful like nothing else.

As we continue through the next month of changeable weather and uncertain temperatures let us hold on to the feeling of the earth knowing how to give birth to what is to grow into a glorious experience of times yet to come. I

The girl born was called Jennifer. Here is some history of the name, which connects nicely with the overall feeling:

 Jennifer is a feminine given name, a Cornish form of Guinevere/Gwenhwyfar adopted into the English language during the 20th century. “Jennifer” may mean “white enchantress” or “the fair one” (from Proto-Celtic *Windo-seibrā “white phantom”).

Image: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/heidiwoodlawn/ostara/
Advertisements

The Element of winter

water element magic

My way is the Elemental way. I see the world through the five elements and work with them the most in my nature communication, magical weaving and spells and when relating to others. I have a power and a shadow element and the world makes sense to me in a way it is made of the elements all around me.

The season of winter has always been a Fire element season for me, full of creativity, drive, focus, enthusiasm and passion. It has always been a time when my inspiration would be present and my mind clear and full of ideas. I would complete a lot of projects during winter usually. Many writers report the same thing. This year it is different. This time it feels softer, smoother, slower accompanied by quiet, silence and a peaceful retreat into inner spaces.. In dreams I am met with a lot of shadow material and crying physical tears. The season feels closer to the element of Water. As water here doesn’t freeze in winter it is very much present, but in a state of quiet still standing. Perhaps, it depends on where we are at any given point and what our intentions are and currently my preferred state is of slow motion in silence and solitude with no need for many words or interactions. It is a very relaxed state of being with nothing to do and nowhere to go, quite the opposite energy of my usual winters. Water element is in this year’s signature I also feel regardless of what the season is now and yet to come, as we are in the feminine rising energy, but not for the first time. The archetypal flow is quite advanced this time and more powerful than ever. It is very consious and knowing ready to share its wisdom with us all. What would be interesting to explore this year is that contact with water whether we like it or not. Like for many water is my shadow element and a lot of us have grown up with supression of our emotional states (water energy). If we decide to engage with the element purposefully tt will sure take us on a transformational and insightful journey, no doubt about it. There is that opportunity this year in abundance. I am going to embrace it and put some water magic into my practice more. For the moment, stillness and calm are the energies of the month for me and it feels just how it should be.

What’s your element for the season of winter?

Relationships – another challenge

relationship break up

What’s popped into my awareness this morning post various nightmarish travels overnight is the vibration of a relationship break-up. There is betrayal, abuse, blackmail, manipulation vibrations all mixed into the message that has come through and it relates to what we need to face next year. This past year has been a difficult one in terms of relationships of all kinds. It has been tense, destructive, ugly at times to the point of no return and the reason it has been coming up quite so strongly is to challenge the ways that we have gone about being in relationships up until now. I feel the test, the challenge is closely related to our vibration of pretending everything is fine when something deep within had been telling us it is not. We do this out of fear, not feeling safe in any dynamic different to where we are, but paradoxically keeping ourselves in a place where it is potentially even more unsafe long-term.

Therefore, what next year and this next cycle is asking of us is to sit with the discomfort of the truth about many of our relationships. Face it head on and bring up honestly into the open about whether they are actually working for us. With the next cycle, new moon in place we have a chance to envisage and plant a seed for a relationship that we do want and start working/manifesting/changing either the one we have, doing some reparation/replanting work or a complete renewal brought through awareness and honesty with ourselves and others.

The most important dynamic and a relationship, of course, that we are asked to look at and revisit next year is the relationship with ourselves. Where do we fail and what do we exceed at? Honestly unpicking and looking at each of our own qualities in detail we can find ways of smoothing rough edges or, perhaps, understanding where we don’t always serve ourselves and others and embrace our true gifts, our beautiful qualities, which can be amplified even more with an aim to benefit many around us and feed our soul.

Ready for another ride? Relationships are the hardest to be in, manifest and cultivate things that we experience here in this reality. We grow through relationships, we get to know ourselves through relationships, we live, love and get exposed through them. It is one of the main functions here on earth. It is not going to be easy, but if we don’t attend to our relationship dynamics we risk to be stuck in a vibration of dishonesty, disappointment and eventually resentment.

Many blessings!

Flower deities

It’s all about flowers this week. Their delicate and fragrant pink blanket made me feel alive with what I can only describe as dreamy energy, as if a fairytale setting opened up in front of me and pulled me in.

After a long Pembrokeshire coastal hike I dreamt that I encountered what I now believe were nature spirits or Gods of nature, deities in flower form. I dreamt of all sorts of flowers, vibrant colours of pink, purple and deep blue scrolled in front of me like a kaleidoscope. The whole thing felt intoxicating and bursting out with bright colours. I believe I found new gods to include in my practice – flowers of spring! Something within me resonated with its energy and I experienced its delicious dance within my psyche through my dreams.

The following morning on the island of Skomer flower beings again took my breath away and like a child I could not contain my joy at being surrounded by pink paradise as far as the eye can see.
They are so alive and buzzing with energy quite playful, doll like, a kingdom of colour where the smell spreads around like freshly made candy. Something playful about it as they nod and giggle in the meadow. I never experienced flowers in this way before.

Pink and purple are my colours in nature, so delicate and just the right shade to make me smile and frolick and want to play and on another just stop and stare again with a smile. They give me joy and I often like to kneel in front of them and almost bow as they hang their heads in what feels like a friendly acknowledgment.

These flowers in spring connect me to a vulnerable side, a quality I highly value. They are fragile yet bravely come out every year for the world to see even if it might mean quite a few of them get squashed by careless walkers and some picked by mindless hands. I am sensitive to flowers being picked in the wild. There is just no need. They are on a beautiful display for us all to see already why take it from its rooting space, a space they are most happy and belong.

This new discovery of much deeper connection to flowers that I was aware
of previously made me want to research flower gods, nature deities associated with flowers and roles they play in each season.

 

Number 4 and Diamond Symbol meaning

It is becoming clear that the number four and a diamond shape carry a strong significance in my spiritual development, which then throws light on events in my physical life and provides deeper meaning. I feel it has been showing up for the last few months and only last night I had yet another dream, which featured a number four. This dream displayed a real clock on the wall where I focused on the number three thinking that was the END of a certain appointment, I was simply convinced, however, as dream showed it was not, indeed, till the fourth hour that completion was to take place. It came as a revelation to me and felt so knowing and ‘oh yes’ realisation.

The feeling surrounding these insights is one of strong support and illumination in a way of providing me with not just meaning, but grounding and nurturing.

What number four means in a spiritual sense is a completion of some sort whether it is a cycle, a task, an undertaking or a journey. I have known about the meaning for sometime through my transpersonal studies. On looking further it does resonate deeply with my practice and beliefs and I felt recently, e.g. number three (trinity of things) incomplete somewhat. In fact only recently I wrote about Tarot card readings where I talk about four cards readings HERE

As we approach the end of the calendar year and Winter Solstice 2016 I am even more in tune with what might be showing up for me regarding symbols I am witnessing. I really resonate with some information and research out there on number four and diamond shape. HERE is a good article

Four Moon cycles, four seasons, four elements – all important parts to my spiritual practice, which I have deep relationship with.

This, what feels like a change, a new beginning, is pointing me towards solidifying some of my beliefs and practices and adjusting how I see and do things going forward. One insight I had this morning was about the Triple Goddess (Wiccan), which I have always identified with, but again, it is that three that felt incomplete to me and this morning it felt strong. Therefore, the forth aspect came forward to me – a child aspect. It seems ‘she’ (little baby soul and a little girl) wants to get in on the game and be integrated into my spiritual practice as well as serving my psychological development further providing insight into my natural essence. This makes sense to me and before the time of Maiden, which I feel comes around Spring Equinox there is time for a child self, who is essentially ‘in the womb’, in the darkness of winter. This links with all sorts of insights into shadow aspects and those parts of myself that need healing and it is a continuous flow of work, which doesn’t stop. It gets deepened with every change of season.

Another insight that came was about the trinity of sacred lands. I also wrote about this recently HERE and what came to me was the fourth ‘land’, which wants to be included and integrated in the whole of my experience on Earth so far, that is the land of my birth – Siberia, Russia.

I aim to do more work, meditation and analysis on the things above to gain better understanding of what needs attention, change, integration or acknowledgement and I feel very excited by it. I feel touched, privileged and humbled by such beautiful opportunities presented to be through my relationship with spirit and myself on a soul level and a gift of dream life that I have. Always keen to learn and listen I look forward to having my dreams continue bringing me information and messages in the meantime.

IMAGES 

Dreams speak in symbols

I had a dream, which spoke of the masculine energy. It was full of symbols, spiritual foresight, alchemy, the state of inner world and Runes language.

HOUSE

Dreaming of a house or dwelling shows up a state of our inner world at any given moment. I often dream of houses and depending on where I am in life it changes, from a derelict ruin to magnificent palaces filled with space and gold, from towers to small cottages, from small buildings to multi-stored blocks of flats.

Last night it was a perfectly formed, compact flat in an ancient building full of history and spirits. Something like this

I remember touching its exposed old walls and feeling a sense of awe and joy of living in such a sacred place. I felt a sense of legend, wise men and education surrounding me. I had to climb to the dwelling through dark and narrow corridors till I reached the flat I was to call my home and when I made it inside and came up to a an open window I saw the world right in front of me. I could see for miles and horizon spread in front of me filled with beautiful golden light. It felt magnificent and my heart sand with gratitude and peace.

SYMBOLS/RUNES

There was a man in my dream, who wanted me to draw a symbol in the air with my hand. He was giving me instructions on how to do it and I managed to produce one after several attempts. It was this

Meaning: Meaning: movement, work, growth.

URUZ (reference: sunnyway.com)

Uruz: (U: Auroch, a wild ox.) Physical strength and speed, untamed potential. A time of great energy and health. Freedom, energy, action, courage, strength, tenacity, understanding, wisdom. Sudden or unexpected changes (usually for the better). Sexual desire, masculine potency. The shaping of power and pattern, formulation of the self.

This, to me, speaks of the presence of masculine energy within me and how aligned it is with the current season before the Oak king is born again into light on the 21st December. This energy is familiar to me and one of great achievements and productivity. Winter is a highly creative time for me when I do most of my writing and I feel very energetic working on various projects and collecting ideas for manifesting. I often light a Red candle during this time to aid me in my Fire element of productivity, strength and determination.

MASCULINE

It is the time for me when my inner world forms into whole, masculine and feminine together and shows me how masculine energy is often misunderstood and misinterpreted. There are stereotypes of what a man or a woman should be, what qualities they should portray and which they should hide. My dreams often show me how to break through those stereotypes and look within for what it means for me and what is of value to me at the time. The man in my dream was not perfect, was not strong or ‘together’, if anything he was a bit lost, unsuccessful yet holding his head high and opening his big heart. His voice gentle, not booming and strong, full of offering support and encouraging me to make my own choices. It keeps the door open for me, invites me to step into my own masculine power whatever that might mean for me. I have to spend some time after such dreams in quiet contemplation to make sure I really hear him with no judgement.

Approaching sacred time of Winter Solstice when we welcome light into the world once again, look within for your own light and what it means to you. How can you manifest what stirs within your soul in your daily activities and relationships? Is it family, is it creative projects or finding a new way to be, is it consolidating all your resources and feeling yourself as a whole being ready to step on a path of spiritual and Earthly wisdom.

Remember, in dreams what matters very much is how they make your feel. Your emotions and after-dream states are pointers towards what is to be learnt and what to pay attention to.

Blessings!

header image: http://typotic.com/i/dream-world-for-love/

Dreams and Knowing yourself

Dream offer very rich material to us in terms of what we need to integrate, embrace, celebrate and learn about ourselves. Dreams are great tools in our quest for self-realisation, for individuation. If one is fully conscious of dreams’ potentialities and possibilities, one will be welcomed into the potent world of significant symbols and sensations, which ultimately lead us to the core of ourselves.

I had a dream this week, which strongly connected me to the ‘crone’ side of myself. I felt this incredible power deep inside my being and a sense of anything is possible in both terms – shadow and light, destroy and flourish, love and force, revenge and forgiveness, anger and surrender. The feelings that one wakes up with in the morning after a powerful dream can not be made up. It is potent, it is there and it is leading us to where we are meant to be going in terms of manifesting our own qualities into our daily lives, decoding symbols and messages and making sense of what it is like to be us, to be fully conscious of paradigms and realities we find ourselves in.

The dream sparked my strong association with the crone Goddess Baba Yaga. It revealed my open connection with her qualities and the feeling of being attracted to the Goddess. She is very much a part of me. I spent my day in contemplation of what it meant for me and of course, messages became clear pointing me towards certain qualities that I have within me, which the crone planted into my soul. This power that I can use towards both sides and some of which is still manifesting in my life in one way or another. It was also pointing towards my past wounds, which I suppressed and buried in the shadow, but it is time I looked at it fully. It is inevitable and I always knew it would surface and in what a wonderful way it did. The material I have been avoiding is rich with valuable lesson and ultimately seeking to help me become a fully integrated person. It’s been long time coming and I am in love with the process of unfolding through imagery and stirrings in my soul.

Baba yaga

These are just some ways to engage with your dreams:

  • let go off any rules, attachments to a particular meaning
  • follow your felt sense, ask yourself first and foremost ‘how did I feel when this and that happened…’ when reflecting on a dream
  • was there a particular image, figure, character, colour, space that struck you in a dream and you were left with for hours after waking?
  • just and recall any changes in feelings, sudden changes in scenery, behaviour – how did that feel?
  • if you get an insight into what it might mean, do not rush, sit with it and drill it down into pieces. Do they make a whole?
  • just know that whatever makes sense to you is the right way to go about interpreting and integrating dreams’ material
  • all dreams are about YOU and FOR you

I offer Dream Navigation services to anyone, who is interested in de-coding imagery and symbols, unfolding, integrating and embracing materials that present in dreams. There are two ways to engage in the process with me

1. I offer my intuitive interpretations and guidance on your particular dream, as I feel the source is communicating to me about you with psychology-related steps that might be relevant on your journey

2. We have a live session (in writing) where we explore a dream together for 30 mins

$37.00 

 contact me for more details
picture: http://digital-art-gallery.com/picture/gallery/baba_yaga