Lessons in challenges 2019

Now is a very futile time for psychic material to align with the universal wisdom. This year has been challenging, but what is beginning to transpire that this time round challenges are dressed as opportunities. More than that these opportunities present themselves as a deeper way of working with what we need and want in order to shift and move forward towards thriving. The goal now is to change how things are done on a more meaningful, conscious and intentional level.

You might have been experiencing creation of space or an ‘emptying out’ effect. This is true for me. Emptying in a way that might look like ‘lack’, but actually it is clearing the ground for us as an opportunity to create completely anew. It is challenging us to see whether we fall into our old patterns of thinking through our core believes, defaulting, or going towards needs and wants with clear intentions instead. To notice is the key here.

When you observe your reality right now, what do you notice? Do you feel a certain shift in energy and things around you lately? How does it feel to you? What do you think this shift is asking of you? Remember that whatever happens in the universe at large it always has your best interest at heart. It wants you to grown, thrive and be your best creative self. It wants you to manifest, so it is a positive even though it might feel as negative.

If it does feel bad to you ask yourself what your instant reaction is? Do you see yourself resorting to old ways of trying to bring back what you think you are losing. Any shifts, chellenges or changes are designed to trigger you, but if you are aware of what is being triggered and why (doesn’t matter what triggers you), then you can catch it and resist an automatic reaction that you had always used. Instead stop and be with what is happening.

For example you might experience a decrease in sales in your business or a number of your regular clients dropped to a minimum. One reaction could be fear and panic, which is being triggered and we automaticallly beginning to think of things in a way of ‘surviving’ and then making choices based on what we think will stop us feeling that way. Natural, but there’s another way. Notice how your intentions in such cases come from ‘lack’ rather than what can be possible or in other words, abundance. Another response could be to say it is ok to be where you are. Pause, reflect on whether what you have been doing had been fulfilling to your true heart’s desire. You might be surprised. And if the answer is no, exactly that empty space is offering you an opportunity to create anew and move into your next stage of consciousness with your true needs and wants in check. It is not something you are doing or not doing, none of it relates to your abilities and gifts it is all about applying default, historical patterns of thinking to one situation after another. Time to change the method itself.

It is this month in particular that is so opportune for old stuff ‘exploding’ in our faces, it is a build up of energy (Solstice in nature) that is not often pleasant for everyone. Cycles begin to go back to zero, resetting time, which is an opportunity to create again consciously and with a clear intention. It comes as a tough test to see if we fill this space with stuff that’s coming from fear, position of ‘whatever it takes to feel safe, doesn’t matter what and how’ or will we allow for things to come to us via intuition and awareness, therefore, manifesting what we truly need and want.

Emptiness triggers fear and pulls us back into ‘unsafe’, ‘not enough’, into a survival mode, but what if we looked at emptiness as an opening for creation, a blank canvas where anything is possible.

Embrace your pace

A vibe of steady pace manifested on this beautiful and gentle Beltain morning. The air was still and fresh and very present through my body. Something landed in me this morning. How interesting the timing yet so divine. I felt something has arrived finally to say ‘this is it’, ‘the time is now’. It was like a door opened into the light of green and as I dug my hands into fresh soil I felt the heart softening and breathing steady itself.

In the society and through centuries for women it has been all about go go go and do do do, the more tasks the better, the more organised and achieving the more valuable you will be perceived. Such a false human race for time, more jobs and tasks, more activities, etc. No wonder maidens coming out of attachment are exhausted and feeling low in self-worth.

This morning the triple goddess stood strong in her message. Being free and spacious is vital for manifestation of the whole within a being. Slower is not lazy, slower is wiser. It is intuitive, flowing, knowing. Rest and reflection are necessary for manifesting true identity and purpose. I felt it jolt and slot in my body this morning like a piece that’s not always acknowledged or allowed. I have been awareness of my self-created freedom for some years now and consciously been practicing my gratitude for all that it represents, for all that it’s given me. The most sacred thing I always wanted.

Freedom is so desirable and often seen as unachievable and a dream and when it arrives we resist it, putting ourselves in prison, overloading ourselves with more to do to contradict it, as it is not something we are used to. The sadness hovers over it within, as we know we truly desire to be free, but can’t allow it.

It takes a lot of practice to feel completely free and in a slow pace of life. It is the most precious gift, it seems, we all seek and now is the time to say yes to it and recognise as truly ours for the taking.

Authenticity dream

Every year’s signature contains an authenticity message at the heart of it. I believe it is the future and has always been something true evolution is made of. The energy of it will only increase with each year and that is the beauty in welcoming a new year where such opportunity exists.

The dream is about authenticity, true beauty, light and dark.

“I was given some stunning liquid of silver and gold that was meant to be put on a face like make-up. It felt luxurious on the skin and looked beautiful. I put it on all over my face and walked into a room with a long table where there were people sitting either side.

One side of the table loved it and admired my beauty. The other side didn’t like it and preferred me without it.

There was a dilemma for myself. What did I like? What did I want to do? ‘The mask’ continued to feel wonderful on my face and looked truly stunning. It gave me a certain advantage and edge, one might say.

In the next scene I am heading towards showers to wash my hair and there is a man, who says ‘if I wash my face off I will no longer be the most beautiful woman in the whole world and will become the second in line after some other woman that will jump to the front. The man smirked and had an expression of warning about it as if to say ‘really think about what you want to do, think twice…’.

There was another man in the room, who had light hair and appeared very quiet, calm with a soft face, the opposite to the first man. Looking at him I knew instantly he didn’t care for my ‘mask’ much or the way I looked at all. He saw through me, deeper.

I decided to get rid of my face make-up and leave my hair unwashed and instantly felt lighter and more grounded.

I took a hand of the blonde man and we walked outside to the light. He appeared to have something lodged in the inner corner of his left eye. A thin stick, a string of some sort. I said to him that I will attempt to pull it out, but it might hurt. This felt like something to do with the way he was seeing things and, perhaps, the object lodged obscured his true vision. I starts pulling the string out, it was very long. The man didn’t flinch or changed in any way, he just smiled gently at me.

We embraced and fell on the ground when I realised I had a pure white coat on and was lying in mud. For a second I was concerned but quickly relaxed and no longer cared in his arms whether my coat would get ruined. His support and acceptance was all I needed.”

One of the best dreams I have ever had

A tool for raising self-awareness

In 2018 I have gone on a journey of tuning into myself, the world around me with nature continuing to be my sacred, supportive and grounding space on a month by month basis and it has been an incredible way of getting to know myself. I have not just been surprised but amazed at various things that I didn’t even know existed.

I took an approach of keeping a journal taking one month at a time, January, February, March, etc. Focusing my awareness of what happens within me at any given moment, things that arise when engaging with people and partaking in events or when being silent or walking in nature. Feelings that come up for me spontaneously and consciously, when in here and now, when asleep, dream observations, etc.

The main aim of the exercise was sharpening my awareness of myself in terms of qualities, strengths, weaker points, triggers, ways of relating, preferences in being, how well-balanced or unbalanced something was within and tuning into needs that were either always met or never met. These are just some examples of this practice.

Here’s a list of qualities I have discovered and zoomed in for each month as I became aware of those energies in me. Just to give you an example and yes, a lot of it surprised me and offered and opportunity for change.

Once we become aware of something we then are offered a choice automatically. We can choose what we do with that newly found information. That’s a beauty of making unconscious conscious. You can go as deep as you wish into what you discover, or observe it simply as it is or both.

January:

I have truly experienced myself as ‘nice’. This might sound strange, but I saw just how divorced I have been from myself in that sense. This time I felt it, really felt it and knew that to be true. I enjoyed that one. Beautiful sensation.

February:

I spent most of the month in a state of light and loving kindness. It was all about love, the pure kind, the transcendent kind. Another beautiful state. I was made aware that I am

able to go to that place a lot easier than I have given myself credit for in the past.

March:

I was able to transform my relationship with the physical pain and learnt to listen to it.

And so it goes… each month there will be a theme or a feeling that would centre around me and ask tor attention and I would journal around what came up. I have had an incredible year and partly that was due to my conscious choosing of being aware at all times and in tune with what arose without trying to fight it or change it. I observed myself and wrote about it.

At the end of the calendar year I was full of lessons and knowing more than I did last year. My experiment in active personal evolving has been very rewarding and highly interesting. I would recommend this self-awareness tool to everyone looking to dive deeper into finding out more about themselves including a much subtler layers of psyche, not just things that might be familiar or obvious. Super fun. Writing as a tool is generally transformative and healing. If you enjoy writing this one won’t disappoint.

This is something I think I will always continue doing in one form or another. It is now January and I find myself in a very different place to where I was this time last year and it grabs my attention and spikes curiosity. I am excited to enter into any new space that opens up in front of me. Remaining in wonder is an essential part of life to me and for as long as awareness, enchantment and tapping into potential is there, life is full of all things interesting.

Happy 2019, everyone!

Potential is there…

As a new dawn rises over the horizon every morning and root tunnels under a tree in winter begin to stir in anticipation of a new beginning we know of our own potential to start again, to achieve and to grow. As in nature so is in our soul. There is no difference in processes that are within us and out in the natural world.

‘Don’t have time’ is a myth. Time is time and we are in control of what we do with it. When we say we don’t have time it might just mean we are using it on things non-essential or overwhelming ourselves with things that can either be delegated, postponed or even stopped all together.

‘When I have more time’ is an excuse. More time may mean you will do anything but what you say you want to do. More time can also mean less focus and discipline, less structure. Heard of deadlines? I like those as they provide containment for tasks and endeavours and focus efforts and mind on a task therefore often less time or the perception of it can be beneficial to show you how good you can be in consolidating efforts and focusing.

If we want something badly enough we will find the time, always, one way or another. That’s my experience and I am sure many would join me in that. It might take some time to get to that point but mostly it is all in our minds and how we look at it rather than actual time available to us.

Human cognitive constructs keep us back and away from achieving things we are sure capable of if it wasn’t for our mind’s constant talk and us believing its every word. We trap ourselves without realising. What about if we change our perception of our thoughts, we evaluate them as and when they come up. Do we really believe what it’s saying to us on a regular basis. Do we realise that not only we don’t have to listen we can also disagree, ignore and redefine a few beliefs to benefit our moving forward. Here’s an idea. It is all possible.

Realising that whatever is desired within reach is a truly liberating feeling that resides between a heart and a stomach in the body. It has a vibrant, warming sensation with it that can ignite a self-belief and in turn fire up the mind in a way that is focused and purposeful. Our potential is boundless and as we travel we find it out in one way or another. Yes, it requires work and determination, but sometimes things just flow in and out of our experience with ease and comfort. It is in allowing for anything and everything to come in so we can make decisions in which direction we go. Choices are provided and if we are brave enough to take them up we can grow and complete things we want.

The power of awareness

It is possible not to get caught in a web even when you are in one. For as long as you have awareness there’s always a choice. You might even step into the web willingly if you are aware of possibilities of leaving it when you choose to. Until a few years year I would never have thought it possible and would have fought against any potential claim on my freedom. Most of them had been perceived, of course, as I understood working through what they call a ‘prisoner complex, fear of entrapment’.

I am in a place of conscious choice and action and that place of freedom that had been so precious to me has remained intact. True evolution and healing. I got to that place with awareness of life’s constant changes and movements and my own personal choice of being able to step out or away from whatever doesn’t feel right. I also discover that risks can be taken, discomfort can be introduced to a certain degree to test our own ability to adapt, grow and ultimately learn.

The discomfort of being comfortable

It takes time to get to a place where fear has no power and, of course, it is not always possible to sustain it constantly, but that would be unnatural as sometimes we need to be afraid. However, fear that stops us from moving forward is not helpful and pushing through that can open up places within us and show us potential and resourcefulness we might not have known we had. Think of acting in an emergency situation, it is scary and intense yet we all have the capacity to bring forward qualities from within needed in such circumstances. We are all able to respond.

Having worked towards not just defining what freedom is for me for most of my life, but also actively seeking it I have fallen into various traps personally and professionally yet what I know now that the search had led me to a place I now know well. Without trials and errors I would not have comprehended a sense of what being free means and being able to define it for myself. The biggest and most profound factor in any undertaking is awareness. It is like a beautiful chain that offers more and more links as you look at it closely. It is like a trail of fireflies in a night meadow. As you follow one another one lights up ahead. Becoming aware of one thing then leads to discovering another and another until there’s ultimately no end to what we can be aware of and adapting it to our circumstances and situations.

Awareness most of all offers choices and with choices we can see a way forward clearer, there’s a potential to switch course, take a different route, experiment and take risk or simply do nothing. This is powerful and helpful in life’s navigation.